I love my life. I do. It is so rich with wonderful people and beautiful things like the sky and fresh tomatoes and crickets at night. I have baby legs to squish and children pulling on my arms and food to cook and eat and savor. I have friends who are like sisters and sisters who are like friends. I have love, true love. I have music and fun new shoes and new tile in the bathroom. I love my life.
I am reflecting on all these wonderful things because the past month has had so many sad events to throw the happy ones into sudden and sharp focus. I thought about these things especially last night because I finally uploaded a couple of weeks' worth of pictures from the camera onto the computer. Life has been too busy to do it, and I look at these pictures and think about the things I know now that I didn't know when the pictures were taken.
My mom has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's. This is the health trouble that brought them home from Belgium, and which will keep them from returning to their service there, and which they are facing so wisely and courageously. I think I knew that she had it, but hearing it confirmed was quite a shock. Happily she's in the very early stages, and she lives a very active and healthy lifestyle that has really given her a leg up on this. She is doing great, and so is my dad. I admire them so much. They are happy and peaceful and enjoying this opportunity to count their blessings, act now on doing whatever it is they want to do and just love each other and their family. I love them so much and am so proud of them.
My friend has cancer. Well, now two of my friends do. One friend is entering the hospital today to start treatment for melanoma. I am sending him my energy in hopes to help him fight and overcome, and I'm pondering what I can do to express love and support but not be another intrusion in the life of his family. Then two days after I learned of my mom's diagnosis, one of my dearest friends, who overcame breast cancer three years ago, found that it has returned and landed on her bones. This is a fight she will fight for as long as she can, and I send her my energy in hopes of sustaining her. Making this discovery put me in a pretty dark place for a few days, but I have been given the chance to realize how honored I am to be a part of her life. We have heard many tales over the past 10 days of women who have lived with this for many years, and this is what we are earnestly praying for. Love you, friend.
And Elsa. I continue to carry with me the thoughts of my friend's little babe, whom she lost, finding out about her passing only shortly before delivering her. Troy and I do not spend a single moment with our darling Bundle without thinking of my friend, her husband, their boys and the baby, and we speak of them often. I know I've already blogged about them, but my feelings of happy/sad/sorry/grateful are increasing.
Sorry for the heavy posts lately! I have felt very heavy deep inside and it's been a relief to share the burden of this precarious and precious life. I especially appreciate friends with whom I can always turn to when it all feels like it's getting to be a little much. And I appreciate the chance to savor all that I have to live for, however long that might be.