Bitter and Sweet, Traditions Go On

After our many years now of going on our annual tree-hunting trip with our dear friends, it just wouldn't be Christmas without it, and when Mary, the mother in this family of friends, called us in tears asking us if we could still please do the trip this year, of course there was nothing we wanted more.  You see, she and our friend, her husband, have separated, soon to divorce.  Our hearts have been tender and sore, and many prayers have been uttered in search of peace and guidance for both of our very treasured friends. We weren't sure if the tree trip would happen this year due to this sad event, and were not only thrilled that we could enjoy a weekend in the hills of Bear Lake but that we could comfort and support this wife and her children.  It made for an extra sweet weekend, the circumstances causing us to step outside of ourselves and recognize from afar how precious these experiences and friendship are.

We were grateful that the children played well and happily with almost no conflicts at all.  We were grateful for a crisp layer of snow on the ground.  We were grateful for chances to talk quietly with our friend and shed some tears together. We sorely missed her absent spouse and thought of his feelings often.  It was tough, but never for a moment uncomfortable or awkward.  We just love our friends.

One of the great pleasures this year was our chance to drive Inigo, our dueling Spaniard of a Land Cruiser.  We fit quite well inside, even though I still rode in back between the girls.  This seems to be a tradition which I don't mind.  Inigo has quite a bit more room than the old jeep so we had no trouble fitting our boxes and bags, and I didn't get bruised shoulders from the car seats leaning in on me. Definitely enjoyed that.  Inigo is a bit of a rough rider though, so I'm not going to say I enjoyed Logan canyon all that much, but we survived.  And you can not beat the gas mileage on that turbo diesel!

We arrived in the cabin in time to send the kids up to play in the loft while we made soup and chatted away.  There aren't a lot of clocks up there, so I never seemed to know what time it was.  We had late nights and late mornings and late lunches and late starts to hunting the trees and that worked out just fine for all.

The tree hunt itself happened late on Saturday afternoon.  You know what was really nice this year?  Our kids are getting big enough to look after themselves in the snow a bit.  I don't think we had any tears from anyone's gloves falling off and their fingers freezing.  In fact, Bitty didn't even wear gloves and I thought, "Oh GREAT how soon will she be crying?"  Guess what.  She didn't cry.  Everyone stayed in a good mood for the whole tree hunt.  This is miraculous.  We let the kids play in the ice over the frozen stream (another spot where I expected many tears and got none), and they spent quite a while body-surfing down a packed down hill.

We found great trees - ours might be a record as it stood at 14 feet.  I'm not sure we've even gotten one so big, though Troy might remember better than I do, as he does about absolutely everything. It is stately and with perfectly spaced branches.  It's gorgeous.

The rest of our time was spent in much the same way - jammies and movies and cozy kid piles on the couch.  Lots of great meals and greater time to talk.  Our tree stood tall in our living room (we only had to chop off about 4 feet to make it fit....)  and reminded us all season long of the blessing of good friends.

Giving Thanks

Thanksgiving came and went rather quietly this year, in a very pleasant way.  We didn't have huge plans, but we did journey up north to Cache Valley to spend the day with the Preslar family.  We were missing a few of our numbers, and it made it a mellow afternoon, but we were so grateful to enjoy a feast with everyone who could make it.  Aunt Tonja was the super-chef of the day - she works hard to find recipes she's excited about and let me tell you, it pays off. I was in charge of a few pies this year and I will say that they turned out respectfully, but with room for improvement.  I just can not seem to conquer pie crust.  But I will keep trying.  Because it means more pie.  I also made the mashed potatoes, and I used my favorite crock pot recipe.  I have long known of the Preslar boys' love of a good pile of 'taters, so I wanted to make sure I cooked enough of them.  I'll just say that I used a half of a Costco-sized bag of potatoes, which themselves are also Costco-sized.  Meaning HUGE.  It felt like we came home with more potatoes than we brought, there were so many left over.  But that was better than not having enough, especially when you use the rest for shepherd's pie the next day.  See? More pie!

Skip loved hanging out with Rascal while we watched the Dog Show

I did make an attempt during November at helping my kid think about gratitude by making a tree trunk out of brown paper and hanging it on the fridge.  I bought a bunch of colorful leaves (thank you, Utah Idaho Supply.  Best school supplies and cute bulletin board things anywhere!) for the kids and us to write on.  We hung up leaves on our fridge all month stating the things we were grateful for.  I was happy it worked out nicely and sure brought the fall colors inside.

In closing this post of thanksgiving, I am going to post something I am deeply grateful for, and that is poetry.  I discovered a poem written 60 or so years ago by a man named Jack Gilbert, and I love it.  I'm grateful for his words, and for his stubborn joy.

A Brief for the Defense

Sorrow everywhere. Slaughter everywhere. If babies
are not starving someplace, they are starving
somewhere else. With flies in their nostrils.
But we enjoy our lives because that's what God wants.
Otherwise the mornings before summer dawn would not
be made so fine. The Bengal tiger would not
be fashioned so miraculously well. The poor women
at the fountain are laughing together between
the suffering they have known and the awfulness
in their future, smiling and laughing while somebody
in the village is very sick. There is laughter
every day in the terrible streets of Calcutta,
and the women laugh in the cages of Bombay.
If we deny our happiness, resist our satisfaction,
we lessen the importance of their deprivation.
We must risk delight. We can do without pleasure,
but not delight. Not enjoyment. We must have
the stubbornness to accept our gladness in the ruthless
furnace of this world. To make injustice the only
measure of our attention is to praise the Devil.
If the locomotive of the Lord runs us down,
we should give thanks that the end had magnitude.
We must admit there will be music despite everything.
We stand at the prow again of a small ship
anchored late at night in the tiny port
looking over to the sleeping island: the waterfront
is three shuttered cafés and one naked light burning.
To hear the faint sound of oars in the silence as a rowboat
comes slowly out and then goes back is truly worth
all the years of sorrow that are to come.
Jack Gilbert

Out of the Frying Pan, Into the Fire

You know how I was all excited about the reduction in the number of pets at our house?  Down from two very very noisy guinea pigs to a single very quiet guinea pig? (And no, I can not account for the change in the single pig's noise level - it's possible she is still traumatized by the absence of her friend or maybe she was just complaining about how obnoxious the other one was all the time.  Not sure, and no, I don't really care.)  So yes, I was pretty excited.

But I guess the universe felt a change in cabin pressure at our house and couldn't handle it.  

I don't think I have mentioned that for three solid months - and I do mean SOLID - my son Cap has been obsessing about getting a pet.  A pet reptile.  I don't know if I can convey to you the level of obsession we were dealing with here.  I have heard more than you will ever know about reptile pets.  I can say that Cap probably did more reading and studying than he has done ever in his life.  That boy KNOWS about reptiles and how to care for them.  The problem was...well, there were lots of problems.  Partly - and I may have mentioned this before - I have noticed how when my kid gets a pet I suddenly have a lot of pet care to do.  Also, I wanted Cap to save up some money on his own to pay for a pet.  And also....what he really really wanted the most of all was a caiman.  Do you know what that is?  It's not a lizard.  Or a snake.  It's a crocodilian.  And we are NOT getting one.  It only took a month or so to convince Cap that a caiman was really not going to happen, though I don't really think he ever really saw the light as to why this was not reasonable.

So he moved on to iguanas.  That was a little better, but still, those things get to be about 6 feet long and can have nasty temperaments.  And need a bit more space than we have, although Cap was completely willing to turn our back porch into a tropical aquarium for large lizards.  After another month of hourly conversations about lizards, he finally moved away from the iguana idea.  And onto something called a tegu.  I don't even really know what that is, and I don't really want to know.  All I needed to hear was that it's a four-foot long beast that Cap intended to let roam free.  In his mind, that solved the "we're not spending thousands of dollars on a lizard enclosure" issue.  And did I mention that they are carnivorous?  Yea.  That too.

After more conversations about reptiles than I can count, I had what I thought was a brilliant idea.  I said, "Cap, how about this.  Instead of saying absolutely not to any type of lizard ever, you get a smaller-scale lizard that you pay for, you care for 100%, you clean up after absolutely all the time, then I will know that you are a responsible pet owner."  (Note how I didn't say, at any time, that we could then consider a bigger lizard.)  He was slightly crushed at first that I was absolutely saying no to a tegu, but he began to see the upside of this.  And I was thrilled with my brilliant plan because I thought it would take him months to earn and save money, to find the right lizards, to get the equipment.  

May I just say that it took all of three days for Chase to be offered a short weekend job that earned him more money than he has ever earned in his life?  And that he has a buddy at school who just happened to be trying to sell two bearded dragons along with quite a lot of equipment?  Oh yes.  Three days.  And suddenly my brilliant plan of making him work and save turned into two lizards arriving at our house the day before Thanksgiving.

So...I'm not going to lie. I can not deny that I am an animal lover.  I'm the one who still has pretty much my very own pet guinea pig.  And these two lizards are actually really super cool.  Cap has been diligent in caring for them, cleaning up after them, chopping salad for them and even bathing them.  Yes.  Bathing.  Apparently it's really good for lizards.  And Troy and I have read with Cap lots about these lizards and invested some of our own dollars into making sure they're getting the best care we can give them. Yes, we're kind of suckers.  But they are cool animals.

Their names are OmNom and Samantha - inherited names, but I think Cap is sticking with them.  They are really fun lizards - very active but not all skittery.  They are completely willing to be held and don't run away.  They are pretty calm and are active during the day.  They only require two full aquariums and three different types of light sources each to keep healthy and happy....so you know, Cap can start pitching in on the power bill.  Okay, they're awesome, and it's so fun to see Cap happy.  His lizard obsession is currently sated, praise be.  The only issue is finding lizard sitting when we go out of town.....anyone up for this weekend?

Best Hip Wiggle Ever

Skippidy, oh Skippidy.  You make life better.

I went to watch Skip in her class play, in which she played a bunny rabbit.  I'm not going to give a full recap of the play, but I'm going to say that in the final song of the show, she did this little hip wiggle that absolutely cracked me up.  Just want to save the memory.

Tropical Halloween

Okay, not tropical, but certainly balmy.  I didn't even bring coats to St. George. Even though I usually LOVE arguing with the kids about putting coats over their costumes, I didn't bother this year.  I might consider Halloween in St. George every year.  And not only were we able to celebrate Halloween, we were there for some other awesome events as well, which made it all the more fun.

So despite our late-afternoon drive and even-later-evening guinea pig delivery, we still had some quiet time on Friday evening to spend with the family and we were able to meet little baby Samuel Miles.  What a treat that was.  It took us all of .052 seconds to absolutely fall in love with him.  My kids included.  It was certainly a joy to see them snuggle up that baby and get all glowy as they gazed at him.  Made me a little glowy myself.  We were so lucky to get a chance to spend some of that very very precious time the first week of Sam's life.  I tried to fight off my swaddling obsession.  It wasn't easy.

Saturday had much going on long before we donned our costumes.  First thing was that Siena got baptized - I hope the big events of the weekend didn't make her feel overshadowed; I know there was much going on but I think she felt deservedly celebrated. She was absolutely darling in her white dress and happy smile.

I love this picture.

And also this one.

And this one too.  So cute!!

Following Siena's baptism we enjoyed brunch at Peter's house, and we lingered for a long time.  That was partly because we were waiting for their bishop to make an appearance so that baby Sam could be blessed.  Usually folks wait a month or two instead of five days to give their babes a name and a blessing, but since as much family as could possibly gather were already gathered, Peter and Sheri went for it.  I'm so very glad they did.  My dad was very brave and brought mom down to St. George for one horrible night's stay at a hotel (mom is not a very good sleeper these days) in order to be able to be present for Siena's baptism.  I was so happy he also got to take part in Sam's blessing.  It was pretty tender to see both dad and mom spending time with their (probably) last grand baby when he was so new, and be able to be with Siena on her big day.  After the blessing dad hit the road to get mom home and hopefully get a better night's sleep. It can be really hard for him when he has mom on a bad night.

We had a little quiet time which included dashes to Swig (duh) and a couple of other errands.  During our quiet time we enjoyed a walk to the neighborhood school and playground.  There Cap found a lizard climbing the school walls and was absolutely relentless in hunting it and eventually capturing it.  The man does love lizards.  He was considering asking us if he could keep it but we just said, "What would the Kratt brothers do?" and that was enough to stop the question mid sentence.

Then it was time for costumes! Peter and Sheri's ward was holding a chili cook-off early that evening, and it was very conveniently held in their circle so we could all enjoy the company and the food while Sheri could keep Sam in the house and away from too many germs all at once.  It was a fun dinner and seemed like a great tradition. The chili cook-off was short and sweet, and not long after we were ready to start roaming the roads of St. George to collect candy and see the sights.  I have to tell you, I don't think I have ever experienced a Halloween like this before.  I have only ever been in colder climates, and I'm used to dark streets and freezing fingers and the hills of the avenues while kids are gathered here in there in rather small numbers.  That seemed pretty normal to me.

St. George was NOTHING like that.  It was warm out.  The streets were well lit.  Absolutely EVERYONE had decorated with lights and sometimes music and there were haunted houses in people's garages. Trucks with trailers drove around with speakers playing holiday tunes.  There were throngs of kids absolutely everywhere.  I couldn't believe it.  I felt like it was Halloween in the movie E.T.  I was kind of in shock.

We spent an hour or so walking up and down the street near Peter and Sheri's place, but soon we hopped in our cars and headed to Sheri's parents hood where word has spread that they have the best candy and decorations of anywhere in town.  I'm sure the rumor is true - what a fun neighborhood!  And if you get past the first few blocks where there were Disneyland-esque crowds, it was just a fun and pleasant place to walk and collect a dang lot of candy.  My favorite was the house where the dad dressed as Santa Claus and handed out little mini ice cream cones.

And I have to say...dang dang dang it.....Bitty looked darling in her Turkey Dinner costume, much to my chagrin.  And delight.  Parenting is hard. (See two posts ago regarding our costume trials.)

We didn't stay out too super late, we didn't collect an obnoxious amount of candy - just the regular shocking amount.  It was just right.  And the next day before we headed home, of course, we did a little more Sam-snuggling.